I recently caught up with a friend and we were talking about life. How things had turned out differently than we had thought when we were growing up. How happiness isn't what we thought it would be. And then we started talking about happiness and defining it for ourselves, our children and perhaps what our parents thought it was. From happiness we went on to love. Now that was an interesting turn of conversation.It got me thinking about what a good love story is. I have read so many books over the years. It is funny how what used to make me swoon and giggle, now comes across as childish and unrealistic.
Classic Bollywood and Hollywood movies with a good love story were the thing to make my heart race and daydream about my future love life. Boy meets girl, girl flirts, boy pursues and girl finally relents and then they live happily ever after. Sure some stories had some twists but at the end of the day; all is well!
With time, wisdom and a little maturity, my definition of love and a good love story has changed.
"Wiser" definition of a good love story:- A good love story has flaws. The characters are not perfect though, they may come across as such initially. But we soon learn the characters are dealing with some internal struggles too ugly to express. I am watching a really wonderful Urdu drama serial these days called "Humsafar" (Companion) and this story started very innocently and had all the makings of a sweet story. A story about two people who reluctantly entered into a relationship and though they tried not to like each other, they realized with time that they had more in common than previously thought. And after a few episodes of romance galore(which I relished and ate it all up), the story is now taking a turn for worse and bot parties are now showing their flaws and their ugliness. I kind of know how the story ends up (don't worry NO SPOILERS HERE), but I am really enjoying the ugliness of their love story. because they both still love each other and they both are hanging on to their flaws. Love it! (For updates and more on this really good love story check out their Facebook page, https://www.facebook.com/HumsafarHumTV)
- A good love story is imperfect. There are nasty trials and turbulations. nothing is easy and nothing has a solution. But despite that they are together. Even if they can't be with each other physically in the same space, they are together. "The Gargoyle" by Andrew Davidson is such story. I won't go into great details about this book. It is DEFINITELY a must-read. (Here is a short synopsis of the book, http://www.chapters.indigo.ca/books/The-Gargoyle-Andrew-Davidson/9780307356789-item.html?ikwid=gargoyle&ikwsec=Home) In this book, there is a story of a love which comes from respect and is experienced from afar. Though, they know they can never be together, the one character is content with the fact that he has enough love for them both.
- A good story is about being content. It isn't about being "blissfully" happy all the time. That pink fluffy ever-eluding "happiness" cloud is sappy and unrealistic. No one lives happily ever after but we all find a place of contentment and peace where we can live with out our imperfect love stories. Case in point " The Time Traveller's Wife". She knows what she has and it is beautiful even with all its flaws. http://www.chapters.indigo.ca/books/The-Time-Travelers-Wife-Audrey-Niffenegger/9780676976335-item.html?ikwid=time+travellers+wife&ikwsec=Home
I would love to hear what your thoughts are on this. Do you enjoy a perfect love story? Do you like a tragic love story? what rocks your boat???Thanks again for reading my ranting and raving.
Dear Ayisha, I read your reflection over a good love story. I really enjoyed your views in fact i really like the way you jot down your ideas,good piece of creativity it is. Like you,I have always been thinking of initiating blog writing but never started it off.
ReplyDeleteAs for me,i agree with you that 'perfect' love stories would be too unnatural as well as unhealthy. Having perfection limits the exploration by lovers of themselves and of their relationship. Its only through 'imperfect situations' which occur in life that the partners get to know where do they stand,how much nourishment the relation needs,how they handle things. A good or healthy love story for me is the one in which both the partners are willing to learn and grow and deal better. Besides all the barriers,the priority should be that one person and not the situations that occur.
Thanks so much for your lovely comment! I completely agree with you on limiting yourself with perfection. But I think the key is the readers/viewers of love stories. I would like to think that most of us mature with time and awaken to a fact that perfection should not be the pursuit. The pursuit should be contentment and that doesn't always bring perfection or happy endings. Thanks for reading and would love to hear what other topics you would like covered... :-)
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